4HM
Monday, February 11, 2008
Been long since I saw them. Actually, 2mths only... Since new year's eve i think. Went to Mrs Tan house at Chai Chee today. Hahaha! Saw all the familiar faces. Lets see.. Boon Loong, Lyesheng, Chee Yew, Kah Seng, Xiangmin, Xue Zhen, Huifen, Aldrin, Benedict, Hong Rui, Herng Yih, Hong Kai, Ming Zhen, Jee Siang. Think that about it. Half the class turned up.
We were playing 21 points, with me sharing half profits with KS because I was too lazy to cut into the game. Was a little late cos went to Ubi to pray taisui. Mrs Tan ordered pizza for us to share. Muahaha. Every year thing. Then Boon Loong bought the yusheng as usual. Its like the 5th year since we grad? And i've been there 3 of the 5 times. Guess its going to become a tradition for our 4Harmony. Haha!
As we finish our frenzy of lauing yusheng all over mrs tan's kitchen, we settled down back into our blackjack game. Cannot stand it. Hand itchy so had to play. KS still banker and we still share half profits. Played 3 hrs man. Lowest was -$9. KS almost wanted to skin me alive. CY was busy trying to match my score cos ours very coherent. (he $9 I -$9.) So after playing for 2hrs i was damn stressed. Need to win some money. I managed to change it to $1. and poor CY ended up -$1. Muahhaa! Ending score I $3(phew.) CY lost $17 cos he played $4/game for last 15mins. KS shared $6 with me so each $3. Muahah!
So much for the game. I remember when we're all still sec 3/4. Always sitting in 1 whole row (10ple). Right at the back of the class with our rocking chair against the wall. away from the rest of the class by at least 3 tables. Always snacking with loaves of bread and snacks and tidbits. Playing with class hamster and my blue lobster for 1 day. Remember just staring into space when teachers conduct their lesson. The times when I don't bring any textbook or do any homework.
There's even an incident where 4-5 of us were made to stand outside the class and ended up saying 4hm sells ducks and chickens and we're on sale. We're giggling so much and talking to passerby that our teacher surrender and ask us back into class.
The times when we went to recess only at the last 5 mins and come back 30mins late and caught by Mr Soon/teachers for eating along corridoor. The times when CY flings his 30cent pens out of the window and into the cchs lake. Muahaha.
Sec school seems so far away. The times when things are so carefree. Don't have to think of anything. Don't have to work hard for the future. Don't have to do anything. Just plain enjoyment and fun and laughter.
Things have changed so much. People have changed. THere's so much happening around but I feel so helpless. Just feel like taking a step back to relax but I find ple in front pulling me and people behind pushing me forward. This space that I once had, the space that belonged to myself is no longer there. Watching crunchyroll for 1 day doesn't satisfy me anymore. I don't feel entertained. In fact I think i'll end up falling asleep even if the show is nice. This cny was suppose to be a 6 day break from school. But I ended up doing school stuff. And there's so much more to be done. How else can I relax myself and when's the next chance man?
Its like the time that I spend relaxing is spent planning of wat to do this tml or this week. Is that relaxing? I'm just being dragged into this ratrace. I need a complete breakoff from all the stuff man. Lacking the space to relax is not that all bad. But my motivation to study is totally gone. I'm just completing wat's necessary. I'm living each day with much boredom.
Is there something lacking? Where is my drive to work hard? How to find it back? Sighs~ This thing is getting a bit fustrating because I don't have a solution. SIghs. Better get something done or this sem's grade will chui. Motivation motivation~ Where the hell are u?
12:26 PM
She's got style